Christmas List Angst

It was suggested that I post a Christmas list for my friends who find me hard to shop for. And I thought about it. I feel weird posting lists, because it sounds like a demand to GIVE ME STUFF. And in the event that people have already got stuff for me, I don’t want them to feel that I’ll hate it because it’s not on the list. So I feel awkward. I’m really not a materialist. Particularly because many people on my friends lists are cool people and I want to read their blogs, but I don’t, y’know, plan to get them a Christmas present, ‘cos we’re just friendly acquaintences bound by mutual admiration of one another’s prose, so I’d feel hideously awkward if they sent ME a present, and I hadn’t sent them one. Y’know. And when fans send me stuff, I also feel awkward, because I sorta feel like the fans are doing me a favor in the first place by liking my stuff at all, so I’m doubly indebted.

But then I think about my attempts to Christmas shop for people. Which fail utterly. I can generally retain about one thought at a time per name on the list, which means that, for example, my buddy Alan mentioned once in passing six years ago that he liked Art Nouveau jewelry designs and has now acquired a small library on Art Nouveau because it’s the only thing I can remember.

If I don’t know what to get people, beyond that, they usually get stuck with art. Not, y’know, custom art, which would arguably be a sign that I was REALLY paying attention, but something from the stack of “Stuff I did that didn’t sell,” which means that James has a bunch of baffled relatives in possession of about half the Caliban originals in existence. (Which reminds me, I oughta put the two or three remaining Caliban originals over on the M&M site, because they’re both solid pieces and if I ever want to sell ’em…) I kinda hate giving prints for Christmas, because…y’know. I mean, I make the things… So I give originals lying around. This is the Cheapass Artist Method, although it’s becoming less cheapass, and eventually I’m gonna have to stop as my pricetags accelerate skyward.

And I can’t shop for James at ALL. We are not people who believe in privation, and our modest desires are generally not in excess of our modest disposable income. If James wanted something that we could afford, odds are we bought it already. And after ten or eleven years together, if there was something I knew he needed, I got it for him years ago. He’s a tough one. I think I’m covered this year, but I could be wrong. And this makes me realize that maybe Christmas lists are a good thing.

So! Given all that, IF you are one of the people who feels obligated to get me a gift, and IF you don’t have any ideas (and bear in mind, if you’ve already gotten me something, that this is not an exhaustive list, and just because it’s not on here doesn’t mean I won’t love it) here are a few things that I would like for Christmas. If you’re not someone who can realistically expect a gift from me, please ignore this, because I really am not trolling for gifts here–I can buy my own toys, and probably will. I just wanted to list this in case any of my friends or relatives is tearing their hair out going “OH GOD! What do I get for Ursula?!” It’s more of a public service announcement that these are ideas if you’re floundering, not a demand. Thing. (Have I hedged this around with disclaimers enough?)

(I was planning on making this friends only, but then I realized that my relatives don’t have LJs, and they might actually want to see this because *I* have a hard time shopping for *them* so what the hell, I’ll throw it open to god and everybody. Again…um….no, I’ve said it all already, I’ll shut up now.)

A year’s membership in the Comic Book Legal Defense Fund.

A jumbo print of the “The Muses” by Chris Goodwin from Rabbit Valley. (I like that piece!)

Art. Art is always good. I like art. Posters by James Christiansen, diTerilizzi, O’Keefe, Mucha, or Froud can hardly ever go wrong. Prints are also good.

Anything wombat related. You can never have enough wombat paraphenalia.

A paid LJ account would be nice. So would a paid Deviantart account, for that matter.

Barong masks. I love Barong masks.

Ganesh stuff. Ganesh is cool. I owe Ganesh one or several for that whole comic thing.

Pottery. Specifically dinner plates. I have managed to fill out bowls, mugs, and small plates in my eclectic matched-dinner-sets-are-for-those-who-lack-imagination style, but dinner plates are the last bastion of crap bought in college. (‘Course, there’s always room for a neat mug…)

Tiffany lamps. I love Tiffany lamps. (Not that I expect anyone to lay down several hundred bucks on a Tiffany lamp for me, mind you, but I’m gettin’ in the groove here.)

CLAYBOARD!

Pistachios. I really like salted pistachios.

T-shirts. I’m a large or extra-large. Since my wardrobe is about three-quarters t-shirts, there’s always room for more.

And that, I think, is quite enough out of me. Again, it’s neither exhaustive nor meant to milk gifts out of my already vastly long-suffering readership. But in case anybody was already planning on one and floundering. Y’know.

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